Wants vs. Needs

Can we be happy with things we have and not want for more?

Interestingly enough, I stumbled upon this article today in the local paper and found it timely because a friend and I have been emailing each other back and forth over the whole concept of wants and needs.

I'm still looking for an apartment and, as I've mentioned previously, there are three criteria that said apartment should meet--washer/dryer in suite, dogs accepted and central air.

The argument is that she defines these as wants rather than needs. To some extent, I agree.

In the most elementary sense, these are indeed wants. At the most basic level, all we really need is food and shelter, she said.

Well yes, that's true, but if that's really the case, why not just revert back to our primal selves and become hunter-gatherers? We could build an enclosure or find a cave and just stalk wild game! There would be no need to work because we wouldn't have to buy anything.

(Personally, I'd be all for this, but I'm not really into hunting animals.)

However, taking into account modern day conveniences and the fact that we do have to work, aren't we entitled to enjoy something in our lives?

Look, I'm not grasping beyond the stars here. It's not like I need a mansion replete with butlers, rooms aplenty, an indoor pool and for scantily clad women to feed me grapes while I lounge on pillows.

That I want!

However, to assuage my shattered nerves after a day of running around, dealing with either the oppressive heat or bitter cold (depending upon the season), engaging simpletons among the general public and trying to eke out a living while also pursuing my dream...

I need these things.

For my sanity and the sake of my soul, I need to come home to a temperature regulated apartment (I'm not really interested in a house and all the headaches it brings) where I can experience comfort and seclusion from the outside world at times; I need to live in a place where they accept pets (Jack's pretty much the only thing that's kept me sane the past 9 months); and I need a washer and dryer in my apartment because I've done the laundry room and even the laundromat route and, with my schedule, I just don't have the time to devote to carting piles of laundry around the building or city.

I also need a nice TV since that's part and parcel with what I do (in regard to the column I write) and want to do (in relation to pursuing my dream). I don't need an outlandish 50+ inch, state of the art plasma with a complete theater system, but I need something medium size where I can enjoy what I watch.

That's pretty much it. I'm a relatively simple guy in terms of necessities. Yes, it would be nice to hit the powerball or sell a script and reap the financial rewards to live a little more comfortably, but, in the long run, the former's probably not going to happen and the other might not.

So like in the article that was linked above, I completely understand what she and my friend are saying. Money doesn't buy happiness because the more we have, the more we want. There are certain things we want that we don't need.

But there are those things that we need that others see as wants. It all boils down to perspective.

Sometimes from my perspective in regards to my current situation, I can't even seem to reach the needs so wants are light years away.

Will even the simplest of needs make me happy? Yes. But part of being human is wanting more out of life (not necessarily material things) so I can't guarantee they will make me happy forever.

Happiness is a state of mind and it changes as our situation changes. It's learning to temper our wants and desires with reality to maintain a certain level of happiness.

I've done that because there are things that I want that, at this point, are pretty much unrealistic (given my situation). I've learned to slowly deal with either phasing them out or, in some cases, putting them low on my priority list.

Tomorrow is another day. So is the day after that. Things change and so do people.

What the shifting sands bring tomorrow is another tale of adventure and intrigue. That's why we get up in the morning. We need to believe that each day will be better and more rewarding than the last.

Or at least that's what we want...

;)

*The above cartoon is from Cat and Girl. I checked some of the others out. It's pretty funny!