Fallout, n, A secondary and often lingering effect, result, or set of consequences.
Sometimes that's what life feels like...some sort of bad fallout from decisions made in the past...and now I have to deal with the ugly consequences.
As I drove into work the other morning, listening to some song that I've already heard a thousand times, a question popped into my head...
"Why am I here?"
And it wasn't in an existential sort of way...that's much too heady for that time of day...rather it was a concrete question about where I'm at right now...
"Why am I here?"
Ah...perhaps that's the emphasis that I failed to note in the original question.
Why am I here...in Vegas...at this job...where I live?
And all the while I knew the answer...
Because not one damned thing has ever worked out for me!
No matter how hard I try or how excited I get, nothing comes to fruition.
It's like that scene from The Simpsons where Bart auditions for the coveted part of Fallout Boy in the movie version of his favorite comic book, Radioactive Man & Fallout Boy...Bart turns in a flawless delivery of the character's catch phrase and the director loves him...
Director: Congratulations Bart Simpson! You're our new Fallout Boy!
[Bart gasps]
Director: That's what I'd be saying to you if you weren't an inch too short. Next!
Oh I've been in the right place at the right time...problem is that there's someone there just a little different that seems better in some way. Many times, I'm just an inch too short.
I've been stuck in a rut too...tired of everything...just need a change...
So I've been keeping on the down low in terms of writing here. When every day seems like the same, what's the point of sharing anything? If it's boring to me (and I'm living it...lol), then it can't be a fun ride for you!
Just sharing a few thoughts until I figure out what to do...
Have a great week everyone! Until next time, I'll be on the same path, trying to get out of the rut...
